I wrote this some weeks back but I felt it was incomplete, I still feel that way, so I posting it so that you guys will end it for me.. thank you, I know you guys will help me. I start it, Besala and Efe also contribute and you the readers will end it with your comments……………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Where does the need to feel accepted come from?
The need to belong.
What makes us do away with our principles and beliefs just to fit in?
What makes us uncomfortable with ourselves that we deny what we are?
People who cant accept us for who we are
Who laugh at our uniqueness, and demand that we loose our individuality.
People who cant stand the sight of people not looking, talking, attired etc like them.
People who once said “be yourself” but somewhere between ‘you’ and ‘self’ they failed to tell about the terms and conditions. Terms and conditions which only allows for marginal differences
The ‘you’ which society accepts and the ‘self’ which one will forever struggle with because of wanting to be socially accepted by a society that does not accept People. Those who shut down individuality are the lost ones. Brainwashed to what is mainstream, they only know how to tear down. They can’t accept you because they don’t accept themselves.
Wanting you to be your true self as long as it doesn’t coincide with the idea of what is seen as normal. Trying to find an identity that depends so much on a corrupt social structure. Because we all yearn for acceptance. We all want to satisfy someone. Make someone proud. Have someone look up to us
The hardest thing to do is to accept ourselves, all parts, especially the hidden ones. The dark parts that have seeped into a iron caged subconscious
Battle with the ego. Tear yourself down until you are at the core, where the key to internal peace is sure to be found. And there you can see you were actually accepted all along.
Between you and God who else can love you more?
A peace where love for oneself overpowers all others
A peace knowing you were always an original, always have known your true self
A true individual who just happened to get lost in a social disguise
Someone once said that all kids are born geniuses, but adults destroy the creativity of 99% of them. The need for acceptance actually may have its roots in our desire to please the first significant humans in our lives: our parents. At the young impressionable age, we are rewarded for making our parents proud and punished for putting them to shame. Often, the punishments are not for any explained wrong, but for some perceived inconvenience to our significant care-givers. We may then base our standards for right and wrong just on the comfort it provides to those we rely on for our sustenance.
In later years, this learned behavior may take various forms. We dress according to mainstream fashion and only watch the movies everyone else likes. (For example, I only read novels or listen to music with good reviews from my friends and the world around me.) This desire to please may be exaggerated for people we perceive we have things to benefit from: money, status, power, and whatever we deem necessary for our wellbeing.
How to break free of this? Often, we may need to spend time alone to discover who we truly are and what our driving forces are. Many great spiritual movements were even initiated in the desert where people are reported to have had time alone to meditate. The time alone is sometimes experienced in times of great personal suffering or trial, when most humans seem to be suddenly busy with their own affairs, leaving us to sort out our lives alone. This “wilderness” experience may be the first step to determining who we really are and what we really want, not what others say we are and what others want for us, no matter how significant they may be.
After the last comment I would love the post to end with a tweet from Koshie
There is nothing more rewarding than staying true to who you are