🙂 Another great follow-up post by Mr. Mahmoud Musah..enjoy and pls use the comment section to share your thoughts
~We Must be the Type of Friend we Need~
You see, as humans, we assume a lot… 1 of which is the cause of the phrase you wrote. We assume that SINCE the Type of friend WE need(which would be Our idea of our “ideal” friend) is a good friend, then Automatically- THAT kind of friend would or should be good for another.
See, our ‘idea’ of friend may be true, good and right. BUT that is only reaaally true as far as WE are concerned: meaning, that kind or type of friend is or would be good-True. But we forget that it would be good FOR Us..period.
eg…of a parent(s) simply providing the best this and that for their 5 kids and even making “some” time(as much as they possibly can) to be with them.. And even though across board, the things they provide would be good or even the best; they may end up addressing the needs of only 4 or 3 of their kids… simply because MAYBE one of those kids really needed them to stop-observe-listen to their particular needs…and not all those other things the provided which on the other hand served the other siblings extremely well. This example might be blur…lol but don’t worry if its not clear.
There is a general idea of what or how a friend should be, things like; one who listens, gives good advice, cares enough to check on us and therefore is concerned about us and therefore is there for us through thick n thin…and a few other traits. These are the “universal” ones cos they are good traits and anyone wouldn’t really mind having a friend like that. But assume this:
*If He relates to you the way He would Want you to relate to him(which is Definitely largely based on His needs), and You also relate to him the way you’d want him to relate to you(also based on Your idea of a good friend), does that even mathematically work out? Its going to be collisions all over due to misunderstandings…
why? Because YOU ARE BOTH DOING WHAT YOU “THINK” WOULD BE GOOD FOR THE OTHER PERSON simply because you think it would be good for you.
*most of the best friendships I have seen in my few years are the kinds that have two people who relate almost totally opposite to each other: one always doing the calling, checking up, choosing the places to go, always talking always coming up with crazy/fun ideas, being brave and standing up, etc… while the other is very very comfortable being a listener, always reserved, soft spoken, calming person able to reason and calm the other down… point is, they complement each other and as such ARE NOT being the Type of friend they need to each other… One needed someone to talk sense into them and calm them down whilst the other needed someone to boost their confidence and help them come out of their shell and be save them from social awkwardness…
We must see what each of our friends need from us and Serve them in That capacity(or at least Try our best to do so). Lol… have you ever tried to be a very good “ideal” friend to someone and they’ve withdrawn from you as though you were being too imposing or aggr3 or too nosey or too talkative or something… when all you wanted to do was care, check up and BE that “idea” of friend(You Want) to them…?lol…
~~Our friends should try to be the type friend WE need. And We, should in turn strive to be the type of friend our friends need; because at the end of the day, we all have different needs~~ M.B.M. 😉
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